Weeds

Knowing nothing about a garden and wanting it done quickly I planted small plants without laying lime to balance pH, rocks, compost, fertiliser and straw. I wanted a fast quick fix. I wanted a sugar hit. So naturally of course some plants thrived and some died with plenty of weeds growing in the spaces between the plants. As the soil was healthy it also attracted weeds to grow. Now I have to spend more time digging weeding and fertilising and it is more challenging doing that around the plants than if I had laid a strong deep considered foundation from the beginning.

When I started my business 25 years ago I really knew nothing about business. I had performed my whole life as a singer and musician and apart two short stints working in the shop of my parents Shell Service Station on weekends and then for the Commonweal Bank as a teller and clerk, I had only ever worked in the music industry. I began to play piano at the age of three, from the age of eight was playing for the school morning assemblies, church organ on the weekends and singing, composing, arranging and directing the school and church choirs. My business knowledge was limited yet my desire to create a new option for performers in Queensland was stronger. I wanted it set up as quickly as possible so launched straight into it without systems or adequate knowledge. I winged it with hard work and determination. 

Very quickly weeds grew in the fertile soil of our business and we experienced many challenges that perhaps could have been avoided if we had installed deeper foundations in the first place. After 25 years we are still attracting those me weeds. Why? 

The basic alignments of values of true two business directors seem to be vastly at odds. Are they really or is my perception tainted by the culture from my parents in their own unique vision of relationship? Probably. Definitely. Maybe. 

I as a director have this opportunity to reframe my perceptions of my past to rewrite my own story of story. I am just as loved and wanted and believed in by my parents. They recognised my talents for organisation and gave me free reign. They felt no need to protect me as t hey trusted that I had an intelligence that could manage challenges well. I was left alone by the pedophile priests and I created projects and systems from a very young age. I was nurtured as a leader and a visionary by them. Hazel, Ron, Jenny, Eric, John, Michael, Millie and Kathleen all loved and valued me for being me without any changes. So have my kids and my friends. If I allow my old story to run my life then I devalue their love.

My professional team see my strength and vision and support that. My personal team see my heart and value that. I have been grown in two garden beds my entire life. I have opportunities that few have end from an early age and this will never stop.

What I need is time did space to heal physically and emotionally without being bound by obligation and criticism and ridicule and judgement. 

Wow so much to work on here