To The Girl In Recovery

Go where the energy flows.....

Don't try to change anything

Let it be as it is

If you judge it then you miss the value of it.

Allow whatever happens to be the right thing as you cannot change it and have no control anyway
Be in the moment of whatever presents itself.
Resistance is wasted energy and you miss the good stuff while resisting anyway If it doesn't happen it's not supposed to happen.

Everything that occurs gives you incredible feedback
Trust that you will be ok no matter what...

How you are right now is how you are right now so you may as well just love it now as it is presented to you. In the end you have to appreciate it to survive it anyway so save yourself some time and just love it right now as it is.

Find the ease in this experience.

Find the ease on your life as it is right now.

You choose where your energy goes. If it doesn't feel right for you you don't have to do it.
Not ever.
Trust yourself.
We all die at some point.
It's what we do between birth and death that counts.
So make every moment count
and.....
Have faith that you WILL recover from this.....

Efficient Body

Pain is an indication of stored up unused suppressed energy.

Emotions that have been unsaid and unexpressed.

Shame that has been hidden.

Blame that has been pushed away to be stored and used later.

Emotions not felt are like toxins. 

My body is very effective at keeping them away from my organs. 

It senses the danger to the whole system so it stores them in fat.

THERE HAS TO BE MORE

There has to be more. 

Baubles shiny to distract are no longer enough. 
I am different OR am I on another frequency and they are as well in another form? 
Retail doesn't fill the void - jewelery, 5 star resorts, high fashion clothing, dinners in the right restaurants - nothing fills this void.
What is this void? 
Does everyone have it? 
What is its purpose? 

It is an echo that is drowning every other sound out..

What is my purpose? 
Why am I here? 
What is My gift to the world?

I see beauty in the most mundane of things. I wish to transform shame because it isn't even real. 

It's a manufactured response for no practical purpose other than for onselling  a solution.

Killer New Product

Have you ever felt guilty, ashamed and wanted to run away and avoid pain of some kind?
Have you ever felt like you were ill at ease? You were dis connected from your body somehow?
Have you ever felt like you stood out and did not fit in?
Have you ever felt like there was something so terribly wrong with you that you were an aberration?

How would you feel if you knew that everyone else felt the same way?
How would you feel knowing that you can only ever feel this way if you have a corresponding fantasy and belief that somehow you are in control of your life 100%?

Come on. We ALL have a fundamental belief that we can do better and that we shouldn't have gotten ourselves into this place in the first belief.
All of us.

Consider this?

What we feel guilt and shame and fear and regret and anger about is ACTUALLY a killer new product and publicity campaign.

Think about it........

It's Just a Beginning Again

We are living in a time of unprecedented change. Or so it seems. Never before on the history of the earth have we had easy access to so much information. Or so it seems.

One thing however cannot be googled and that is real live human connection. One thing that cannot be found in a WIKI is the accumulation of experience, knowledge, real time skill and ability to integrate information with function.

Sites and organizations across the globe, culture, belief structure and the Internet are marketing the End of the World. The fear generated in this campaign is a valuable driver in the sale of survival goods and services. When we work from our Reptilian brain we are more open to fear based sales techniques.

As nature exists in a constant creation/ destruction cycle, it will always be an end of some world and the beginning of a new one in a variety of forms.

Here and Earthed

That old pattern is stubborn and determined and holding on through gritted teeth.

Yet when I'm not here, it slowly lets go of me one gnarled finger at a time until I feel free from its grasp.

I am here and earthed.
My being merges with the water earth and air of NYC. 

I am imprinted here.
Beauty even in the slime of the human debris that overflows.

The razor sharp light slices through the protective fat suit and sets me free.
Here and earthed..... my real life awaits me.

Ugh I don't like this Mirror

From a purely scientific observational perspective I seek the catalyst for me opening to be so vulnerable and falling in love in fascination when I feel seen and considered. I lose my sense and logic and get caught in my own fantasy. The connection I feel is to myself via the mirror of another. Somehow I tune into some frequency and I feel so safe so loved so seen so appreciated so healthy so alive in the presence of another. 

I don't understand how it happens. I would love to slow down the process to identify the hook that loops me into this fantasy where I lose time and space so easily. 

If I want to listen to B105 I tune into a specific frequency then I hear it. What factors lead me to tuning into the frequency of another and why? Why did I put myself in that frequency? If I can trust my higher self I know there will always be a good reason always be a benefit directly and indirectly.

Therefore the Grand Canyon grooves for me - the old pattern that water continues to gravitate to run through - is not to be valued. I get Infatuated at first then I feel resented. Coveted with the "what a shame she is fat" feedback then creating dependency leading to resentment . 

But that isn't the whole story of my grand canyon groove. 

See where it is opposite then see what the others groove is. We always attract each other it's not me doing everything it's a team effort. Where am I loved and admired and thought of as beautiful? 

Wise wise woman. 

Yes. 

I wonder if through our senses we will ALWAYS feel both wanted as well as rejected. I think of guys I thought were stalkers and feel as if they were also feeling the same as me in this observation. I dismissed them as I was afraid of being wanted where it was outside of m control. 

Ooh great questions. 

I feel like with another's love and appreciation I was fueled and I could conquer the world. 

Feeling so loved and seen in his presence gave me confidence. I felt my own power like I could do anything. I felt like I was finally being seen and that meant I had added strength to share my message with the world. Without him I feel like I made up my whole experience like it wasn't even real and therefore I am boring workaholic stressed girl with no energy for life again just dragging myself thru the haze of endless work with no sign it will end and nothing to look forward to other than more of the same. 

I'm crying now I said it out loud.

Our goals and visions are like chalk and cheese outside of business.  

That's it. 

In one mirror I shine. 

In the other I have no reflection. 

I'm rebuilding from the inside out.

Shed Old Skins

The best way to survive is to mirror nature and shed old skins, let leaves fall each autumn and appreciative the cycles of destruction and creation.

 Austerity is the new wealth.
 This is the new black.
 Going through this in the first wave prepares you earlier. Early adapters prosper and suffer first so the rest can follow.
Work from home.
Encourage staff in their own entrepreneurial visions and support them as they work as part of your collective.
Employ technology to support growth.
Use the resources that you already have around you.

Tighten your belt. Lean and Mean. Lean and Keen. Use Solar Power, Water Tanks, Backyard Vegie Gardens and Community Bulk Buys– there is so much we can do to save what we used to spend so unconsciously.

Looking after your own health. Focus inwards seeking the master and guru within.

Get creative and find new ways outside of the present money system.

Live as part of a village. Get cracking with community buying and allocating together in fair exchange. Build relationships as wealth.

Sugar is the hit you will crave when you tighten your belts. Prepare for that.
Make your own food.
Play your own music.
Create your own events.

 The real wealth is in Community where we share what we have outside of the limitations of government currency. This wealth is our leverage.

Looking back over the past 25 years of being in this business, it is clear that we have always worked and lived in Austerity. We have a value in every currency - creations, connections, resources, influence, stories, stock, flow and work.

To survive you need to learn to live on less. We will STILL spend money however it is in the choices of HOW we spend that determines what we truly value. Dis-ease happens when we subordinate our value for those of another. This happens so very easily. The one with the most certainty usually drives the car forward stuffed full of passengers eager to have the comfort of a driver willing to take them somewhere.

So do this exercise.
See where you honor your values and see where you do not.
See where you spend in every single currency.
See where you save. Saving is the new spending.
 Where is saving the same as spending?
 How does saving contribute to the economy?

 One thing at a time.
Add one austerity measure at a time until it becomes habit and the new benchmark then add another.

Look at it as an addition not a loss.